Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Help Help Help!

This is the end, my only friends, the end...

Or something to that effect, at least.  After the release of the White Dwarf codex of Sisters of Battle I completely and utterly lost all interest in Warhammer 40k as a gaming platform.  I know that sounds kind of whiny, but I honestly didn't mean for it to happen, it just did.

I played in the 3++ Ladder before the codex came out and managed an amazing 0 Wins, 3 Ties and 1 Loss.  I never really claimed to be a tournament level player, and this event really proved it for me.  Halfway through the ladder tournament players were allowed to restructure their armies and, since a new codex had come out for me, I had to use that one.  The end result of this was me staring at the codex for a while, then just decided not to continue competing.  I felt like I'd been abandoned, and I really didn't feel like trying to fight tooth and nail for draws anymore, especially with an update that would require me to completely relearn army tactics.

I liked the idea of switching over to Warmachine, as the aesthetics for Khador really made me giggle with glee, but a lack of local players and a lack of time and money to invest has put me off of it.  I would love to be reinvigorated with Warhammer 40k, but I just can't think of anything I want out of the war game anymore.  I still enjoy the setting, and the RPGs, but the actual game itself leaves me feeling apathetic.

So, I present here a chance for anyone still reading this to help me find that lost magic again!  Comments are open to advice!

Things I like about Warhammer 40K:
  1. Sisters of Battle: I love the Church Militant in all of its forms, I love badass chicks and I love FIRE!
  2. Inquisitors: This is a bit of an extension on the Church Militant and the fires, but also investigations!
  3. Protagonists: I can't get into an army or theme unless I have characters in mind and stories in my head.
  4. Getting Stuck In: I love combat.  I love rushing in and beating everyone to death with my axes!
  5. Comedy: Sure, it's dark comedy, but it's there!
  6. Tons of Infantry: I like moving bodies on the board and gigantic volleys of fire, or vast tides of guys.
  7. A Solid Chance of Winning: Facing up against an army I literally have no chance against takes the wind out of my sails.  I don't mind losing, I just hate getting completely wiped like a child.
Things I dislike about Warhammer 40K:
  1. Space Marines: I just don't get them.  They don't appeal to me.  I have never given two hoots about space marine characters or space marine stories.  The unbeatable genetically engineered badasses of the universe just seem bland to me.  I don't like them in the fluff, I don't like them on the board.
  2. Chaos: So much of it seems like angsty teenager power fantasy to me that I can't get into it.  None of it scares me, it just kind of annoys me.
  3. Coteaz: He just gets my goat and I dunno why.  You could probably change this entry to the entirety of the Grey Knights codex, honestly.
  4. Gimmicks: I like a good, solid army list with a few tricks, but I sincerely dislike most stuff like FOC Changes and List Building Shenanigans.
  5. List Building: I think this one covers why I am no good at tournaments.  I can't spend weeks or months tweaking lists.  I just try to cover my bases with mixed forces and go, which is apparently a very bad idea.
  6. Spam: I can't fill one slot with all the same units kitted the same way, I can't.  It makes my head hurt and just feels really boring, no matter how good it is on the board.
 So, any advice from my faithful fans?  I'd really love some.  Are any of you still there?  Hello?


  1. First, I can see your points (nearly all of them, in fact), as I share them to varying degrees. As I play a flavor of Space Marines (Black Templars), I can't get on board with number 1. But I can see where someone would feel that way (they really are rampant these days). As I also play Sisters I am with you on the new codex(like thingee in WD). I am sorely butt-hurt they yanked the Inquisition from the army, particularly since there's an Ordo Hereticus Inquisitor option in the Grey Knight codex (seriously? What the heck are we supposed to send her in with? Henchmen only?) I'm hoping that this is only a "dry run" like when they did the same thing with Blood Angels a few years ago, and when the REAL codex comes out they will have un-clustered everything they fubar'd. As for advice regarding your situation, all I can say is, if it's not fun, don't play. I make a habit out of losing regularly, and I have always maintained that I "play so I can paint". I find my jollies by meeting new people, then having them compliment my army while they simultaneously obliterate it on the table. I love the minis, I love the community, so by default I love the game. I'm not a GW kool-aid drinker by any stretch, but I own enough models to field respectable armies for 4 different codexes currently (and 5 if you count my Templars as Codex Marines). At minimum I would advise you to avoid tourneys like the plague they often are, find a few FRIENDLY players to help you suss out the new codex, and see if your opinion doesn't change. I wouldn't walk away without making damned sure it was time, anyway.

  2. I wish I could help, but I'm having similar trouble. Building on what chaplainaerion wrote, maybe the trick lies in taking the base game in your own direction, a more narrative one. I'm almost certain you've seen Killzone, and it's getting fairly well known now, which could help in persuading people to try, but have a look at Inq28 too. This is basically GW's Inquistor played at 28mm, meaning an existing 40K player can get involved more easily.

    There's also Book of the Arbitrator:

  3. It's okay to like the 40k universe and be luke-warm to 40k as a game. Some of the miniatures are fantastic, and focusing on being a hobbyist can be rewarding. Take a year and dedicate yourself to doing some fantastic painting. Re-read Eisenhorn.

    Chaos: +1 on your assessment.

    In terms of Space Marines, I have gone back and forth on this. I had a "hate spess mreens" phase, but I've gone back to being quite fond of them, but not in game terms. I love the idea of every little piece of armor being a relic of prior battles, carrying a history to be revered. The crazy genetic engineering stuff I mostly ignore; I just like the pomp and ceremony of the warrior monk carrying a veritable museum into battle. They should be sculpted and painted as such. Space Wolves and Blood Angels on the other hand are just silly. Maybe something will make me like them one day, but right now they seem cut from the same aesthetic cloth as chaos.

    You like badass chicks and fire, but you like Khador? The Harbinger of Menoth and Feora disapprove of your choice.

    Oh, and don't be afraid to just walk away from the whole thing for 6 months... Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

  4. Thanks guys, this has actually helped me out a lot. I always thought that Necromunda would be pretty cool if it weren't so mired in early nineties cyberpunk aesthetics, and maybe Inquisitor would be the perfect fit for me.

    As for Space Marines, you got me thinking. There is one chapter I think is pretty cool, and that's from the Deathwatch RPG, Storm Wardens. I always liked the Holy Knights concept, and maybe I could think of some kind of Space Marines forced based on that idea. Storm Wardens themselves seem like they'd be pretty easy as a Counts As Black Templars army, but maybe I need my own kind of spin on it.

    As for painting, while I enjoy it, I don't really have the talent or patience to really dedicate myself to the hobby part of the craft. I like doing a conversion here and there, and I like painting up a nice model, but every model I paint takes around 7 hours, and I simply don't have the attention span to keep that kind of thing up. This is why almost all of my models are still slate gray.

  5. Maybe Epic? The 6mm miniatures really don't take much work, but you have bigger war machines like titans to lavish the love on if you feel the need. It's a GW game with the usual forces, and you can still buy the minis through the GW blog, so that might help with getting other players involved.

    There are other companies producing minis in the scale too, like these guys: